The Widower And I

This 22nd day of the The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge: "What fictional character in a movie, TV show, or book do you identify with and why?" got me stuck for 4 days! 

It was so hard to pick one character that I could identify with.

Actually, I knew who to write about the first time I saw the 22nd challenge---Doug in How To Talk To A Widower. I just had some hesitations. 

Doug is a guy and he is a widower! I'm a single woman in my 20s.

If you haven't read How To Talk To A Widower yet, please PLEASE do!

Especially if you like unpretentious characters like Holden Caulfield in The Catcher In The Rye.

Doug was devastated when his wife Hailey died. He tries to live and to stay normal but he couldn't escape the ruthlessness of being lonely at night.

He hates it when people feel sorry for him. He knows he'll be okay soon, but that doesn't mean he'll stop feeling the pain. 

He doesn't hurry up, he lets time heal him, he lets Hailey's memories comfort him, he allows himself to feel his love for her even after she's gone.

He trips, he fails, he struggles through the cruelty of life, but he doesn't stop living. He tries to be okay. He knows he'll be okay.

He is so human. So real, so gritty...so me.  

You'll laugh at his boo boos, you'll grieve with him, you'll feel his love, you'll love his imperfections.  

Let me write here again why I love Doug:

I know exactly what it means to act as normal as possible for the world to see.

I know how hard it is to hold on to something you used to have but isn't there anymore. 

I know how awful it is to deal with something that happened so abruptly, so sudden, and how cruel it is that the world would not even give you enough time to let it sink in first before it goes on.

I know how crazy it is to get pissed and then feel guilty about getting pissed and then get pissed about feeling guilty.

I know how difficult it is to cry yourself to sleep, wake up without feeling the purpose of waking up anymore but getting up anyway and showing the world you're still okay.

I just know how messed up Doug felt and I’m glad that he made me realize I’m not alone, even if he’s just a fictional character.

Between the Widower and I, we all have a Doug in us.